From the category archives:

parenting

"She left her phone/facebook open and there it was...like a punch in the stomach"   Buy inderal without prescription, "Why does he need to chat/text with his ex when he knows it hurts me so much?"

"I don't think anything is going on, but it still doesn't feel right."

"If the text was innocent, why was it deleted?"

"I had no idea my 13 yr old was sexting!"

Social media has created a new dilemma for relationships and families.  There are more chances for private conversations with people outside the relationship, and this can cause or worsen trust issues.   What are your rules when it comes to texting, chatting with or private messaging with people outside the relationship?  Every couple can make their own rules about this.  Here are some things to think about...


  1. Do you imagine your partner can see all of your conversations with others?  Would you be okay if your partner could see everything you write?  Does your partner have easy access to see who you are chatting with?   Do you leave your facebook/email open for them to see?  If not, buy inderal from canada, Inderal purchase, why not?


2.    Be aware of the dangers of private chatting.  The person you are chatting with may not want the same thing or have the same understanding of the relationship as you.  People cross boundaries more easily when they think a conversation is private.  Be aware that positive attention from others feels good and can make you want more.  If you find yourself messaging other people, do you ask yourself what the drive is?  The dangers for kids and teens are huge in that they are exposed to private conversations before they have developed and practised maintaining boundaries around their sexuality, purchase inderal overnight delivery. Inderal no prescription, 3.   When trust has already been broken in a relationship, being completely open about  conversations with others is an important part of the healing and rebuilding process.  If your partner refuses to share passwords or let you see their conversations, where to order inderal, Inderal overnight delivery, then there is a limit to how much trust you can rebuild. 

4.   Do you know your partner's sensitivities?  How much we are open or private is ultimately up to us, but we hopefully care how it affects our partner.   What allowances do you make for their sensitivities in order to build trust? 

6.  A lack of trust can also turn into controlling behaviours.  If your partner gets angry when someone else initiates a conversation with you (out of your control), inderal online sale, Inderal australia, or expects you to cut off any "friend" who they perceive as a threat, then maybe the question is why do they want a relationship in which there is no trust.., inderal alternative. No prescription inderal, 7.  Children and teens should have age appropriate limitations.  There are reasons why facebook is recommended for 13 and over.  While teens need privacy, there is good reason to moniter your child's social conversations until you trust they can handle the dangers, buy inderal on internet. Inderal without a prescription, Ultimately, trust is an action...a choice...something we give out of a desire to grow closer without the erosion of constant fear.   The technological changes in our modern world mean that relationships will need to keep up and develop new ways to manage the added dangers of social media.  What are your thoughts, discount inderal overnight delivery. Buy inderal pills. Cheap inderal in usa. Inderal bangkok. Canadian inderal. Purchase inderal online. Order inderal online. Inderal sales. Inderal online without prescription. Inderal drug. Buy inderal online without prescription. Order inderal on internet. Buy inderal without prescription. Inderal buy online. Cheap inderal online. Online pharmacy inderal. Cheapest inderal price. Order inderal overnight delivery. Inderal us. Inderal online sales. Inderal price. Buy inderal in canada. Discount inderal. Buy inderal overnight delivery. Inderal without rx. Buy inderal on line. Order inderal in us. Where to buy inderal.

Similar posts: Buy omeprazole without prescription. Buy singulair without prescription. Buy synthroid without prescription. Buy zocor without prescription. Buy bactrim without prescription. Buy flomax without prescription. Buy glucophage without prescription. Buy naltrexone without prescription. Buy nasonex without prescription. Buy nizoral without prescription.
Trackbacks from: Buy inderal without prescription. Niaspan without prescription. Shallaki online without prescription. Buy prevacid without prescription. Otibact online without prescription. Clomid online without prescription. Buy cardura without prescription. Buy cialis without prescription. Buy lithium without prescription. Aldactone online without prescription.

{ 1 comment }

Buy viagra professional without prescription, Parents often struggle with how to motivate their children.  Let's talk about rewards and how to use them effectively. 

 When you reward a behaviour with a desired object, the behaviour typically increases.  However, it seems to be that this is a temporary thing...that when you take away the reward, the behaviour can also diminish again. 

Intrinsic rewards are best...we want kids to feel motivated to clean their room because they will feel proud or capable...to do well in school fuelled only by the need to feel strong and accomplished.  We want them to give and be kind because it makes them feel good.  

This happens naturally if a child values him/herself, and you can add to the possibility in several ways: 


  • Expect things from a young age... chores should be routine, viagra professional side effects, Certified viagra professional, build in times when your family gives to each other or to the community.  Expect proper behaviour and you are more likely to get it.  Have family rules that are clear.

  • Attend to the moments when they perform well or when they are kind; attention is powerful and noticing these things builds on them.  The best thing you can do is to not add attention to the times when they don't measure up to your hopes.  Reward with attention the moments when they show the qualities you want to see more of.   Using shame or anger to motivate your child works against the intrinsic motivators because it makes them stop believing in themselves and if they don't believe in themselves they don't care about accomplishing things.


Should I pay my child to do chores?  No.  Most chores should be expected because they are part of a family.  Giving kids an allowance is a separate issue and you should be clear about why you do it.  I like the theory that allowance is about teaching kids to handle money and they can be expected to save some, spend some and give some to a needy cause each week.   As a child gets older and wants to earn special privileges, viagra professional medication, Viagra professional alternative, it may work to have them perform extra chores to earn a bit of pay, but this is beyond their weekly chores, viagra professional buy drug. Viagra professional us, Rewards Can be Powerful in Changing Behaviour.  Sometimes kids get into behavioural habits.  Reward systems (sticker and

[caption id="attachment_784" align="alignright" width="192" caption="Why not make carrots your candy!"][/caption]

 star charts) can be effective and powerful if used temporarily to change a behaviour pattern.  For example, your child is in the habit of seeking attention in public places by screaming for toys or treats.  You can use a reward to encourage a different behaviour that then becomes a better habit.  See blog on this, real viagra professional without prescription. Buy viagra professional no prescription required, Random Thoughts:


  • If you want less of a behaviour, ignore it.  Yes...you can, buy no rx viagra professional, Viagra professional cheap, unless it's unsafe.  Honestly, if we adults could regulate our emotions, buy cheapest viagra professional on line, Cheap viagra professional pharmacy, we wouldn't be taking tantrums at the sight of a sock on the floor or a backpack out of place. 

  • Use a child's desires to guide their behaviours.  It's wonderful that kids want things!  "You want to go to that party?  How do you plan on earning that?"  You want to go to the park after shopping?  If you can get through shopping without whining or asking for anything, we'll go to the park."  This is NOT bribing.  THIS is bribing.., cheap viagra professional in usa. Low cost viagra professional, "Please be good.  If you're good for Gramma you can have a chocolate bar."  The difference is that the first one has a logical connection between the reward and the behaviour...If your behaviour shows me you can be in public and behave properly, you can be in public more.  The second is a powerless pleading for what should be expected at all times.

  • Don't use candy for a reward.  It builds a lifetime of struggling with emotional food issues.  Use natural and logical rewards, purchase viagra professional, Cheapest viagra professional prices, and your attention and special time together as a family.

  • Let your kids develop internal reward systems by letting them own their problems.  If you have a teen who is unmotivated in school, ask yourself if you are caring more about their success than they are.  Only when you give them back their problem and stop caring (controlling, buying viagra professional, No rx viagra professional, protecting, enabling) so much will they learn to want to succeed.


And that's enough for today, buy cheap viagra professional. Viagra professional overnight delivery. Free viagra professional. Buy cheap viagra professional online. Viagra professional free sample. Viagra professional no rx required. Cheap viagra professional in uk. Generic viagra professional online. Buy viagra professional once daily. Viagra professional rx. Order viagra professional from canada. Viagra professional. Cheap viagra professional without prescription. Tablet viagra professional. Cost of viagra professional. Viagra professional from canada. Viagra professional online pharmacy. Viagra professional online without prescription. Buy viagra professional in canada. Viagra professional in malaysia. Order generic viagra professional. Find viagra professional.

Similar posts: Buy cymbalta without prescription. Buy ultracet without prescription. Buy zovirax without prescription. Buy benadryl without prescription. Buy claritin without prescription. Buy lamisil without prescription. Buy lamisil cream without prescription. Buy lasix without prescription. Buy orlistat without prescription. Buy buspar without prescription.
Trackbacks from: Buy viagra professional without prescription. Aricept without prescription. Buy pyrantel pamoate suspension without prescription. Celebrex online without prescription. Tentex royal without prescription. Buy pristiq without prescription. Buy fosamax without prescription. Levaquin online without prescription. Buy jungle burn without prescription. Slimex (obetrim) online without prescription.

{ 0 comments }

the power of rage
Buy black cialis without prescription, Anger can be a very useful emotion.  It can help us identify an unfair situation or problem, and give us the energy to deal with it.  Anger is not always a problem.  In fact, it is sometimes the most appropriate thing to feel and express, as long as it is expressed respectfully.


Sometimes, black cialis buy drug, Buy black cialis internet, however, we develop a habit, buy black cialis, Black cialis no rx, or pattern, that involves reacting quickly to things around us with anger.  We no longer take the time to think or listen...we react.  We explode quickly into a rage.  This can be seen as an addiction to anger. 

Anger develops into a habit because it temporarily gives us something that we want...it lets off steam, black cialis non prescription, Black cialis in malaysia, it keeps people at a distance, or it makes people temporarily stop whatever they doing that triggered our emotions.

Anger is a secondary emotion.  It is almost always covering up some other, cheap black cialis in canada, Order discount black cialis, much more vulnerable emotion.  An emotion we don't want to feel, like powerlessness, cost black cialis, Best price for black cialis, worthlessness or feeling unimportant.  See my kryptonite blog.   In this case, anger is not a useful thing, black cialis discount, Black cialis from india, because it is out of proportion to the problem, or because it targets the wrong problem...the real problem is inside us. 

An example.., buy black cialis in us. Cheap black cialis tablets, We react with anger at the sight of our child's backpack not hung up again.  We are actually overheating with the emotion of powerlessness because we can't make them remember, or unimportance because they don't seem to place importance on what we say.  The problem is not our kid's backpack on the floor.  That is a situation, buy generic black cialis, Black cialis medication, not a problem.  Our emotional overheating and not knowing what to do about it is the problem, and rage is simply a convenient but destructive way to solve the problem, buying black cialis online, Online pharmacy black cialis, because it gets the child to obey temporarily.

But the anger addiction creates other problems.  It forces people to 'walk on eggshells' around us.  It creates equally unpleasant reactions in others, or it sends them to a place of hurt or resentment.  It messes up our lives, buy black cialis overnight delivery, Buy cheap black cialis, like any addiction.

The best way to tackle an addiction to anger is to use the skills of a therapist to help you identify what your own process is and change it.  If you want to tackle it on your own, start by asking yourself these questions...



  • What does my anger help me accomplish?  How does it make my life easier?  Does it keep people quiet/away from me/obeying what I say?  Does it stop people from challenging or questioning me? 


  • What's the worst thing that would happen if I didn't get angry in that situation?  What was I trying to make happen or prevent?  What would make it so terrible if someone irritated or questioned or disagreed with me?  Keep 'boiling this down' by asking yourself..."And what would be the worst thing about that?  And what would be the worts thing about that?..."


  • What feelings does anger help me avoid?  What's so scary about that feeling? 


  • How is anger affecting the people I care about?


That's a start for you.  Empathy for the folks around you will be helpful.  Get some help.  :)

, cheapest black cialis prices. Black cialis india. Order no rx black cialis. Where to order black cialis. Find black cialis on internet. Generic black cialis cheap. Buy discount black cialis. Cost of black cialis. Order black cialis overnight delivery. Cheap black cialis online. Buy black cialis from canada. No prescription black cialis. Discount black cialis no rx. Buy black cialis on line. Black cialis cheap drug. Cheap black cialis from uk. Generic black cialis. Black cialis online cheap. Buy cheapest black cialis on line. Black cialis online without prescription.

Similar posts: Buy neurontin without prescription. Buy nolvadex without prescription. Buy phenergan without prescription. Buy provera without prescription. Buy zanaflex without prescription. Buy arimidex without prescription. Buy atenolol without prescription. Buy coumadin without prescription. Buy crestor without prescription. Buy elavil without prescription.
Trackbacks from: Buy black cialis without prescription. Otibact online without prescription. Gentamicin online without prescription. Buy female cialis without prescription. Adalat without prescription. Remeron online without prescription. Buy viagra plus without prescription. T-ject 60 online without prescription. Buy gasex without prescription. Buy cialis super active+ without prescription.

{ 1 comment }

Buy Cialis Without Prescription

by Lynda on December 15, 2010 · 1 comment


  • Do you say "no" to your child and then give in later?

  • Do you deliver a consequence and then "let them off for good behaviour"?

  • Dole out praise that is not connected to a specific accomplishment?

  • Do you immediately replace broken or lost toys or belongings?

  • Does your child only fall asleep in your arms/with a bottle/in your bed/in a carseat?

  • Do you help your child do things they can easily do themselves?

  • Do you give constant reminders to your child about chores or homework?

  • Do you do homework for them or sit with them as they work?

  • Do you purchase unearned gifts?

  • Do you give them allowance without any expected chores?

  • Do you 'fetch' things for them?

  • Do you try to not let your child fail at something?

  • Do you let your child quit an activity they chose to sign up for?

  • Do you let your child decide what will be served for dinner or what time you will leave a party?

  • Buy cialis without prescription, Are you uncomfortable when your child is upset, and more likely to give them things to stop tears or tantrums?

  • Do you answer countless phonecalls during your workday from a bored or distressed child?


If you do more than three of any of the above....you might be an overindulgent parent!  

Are we raising a generation of spoiled, over-indulged, less resiliant children.

I was listening to CBC radio last night briefly, discount cialis, Cialis cheap, and they were discussing the new trend to raise children to be "happy", rather than to be productive, order cialis, Find cialis online, responsible adults, as previous generations have done.  A researcher was describing how kids are turning out to be less resiliant because of this...less able to handle the ups and down of life because they're not taught how to handle it when things go wrong...they're protected from any distress and this does not help them develop ways of coping with it, cheap cialis internet. Order cialis no prescription, I agree.  I think we do over-praise and over-protect our kids.  Now, I do think the woman who talked about not letting her three-year-old daughter call herself a 'princess' so she wouldn't think she was too special took the concept a bit far...but I think the pendulum has swung too far to the "let's feel really good about ourselves" side, find cialis no prescription required. Find discount cialis online, Self-esteem is only valuable when it's based on specific evidence that we are smart and capable.  Only when we experience rules and consequences can we learn to respect others.  Only when we are allowed to make mistakes can we learn to be careful and responsible.  Only when we are allowed to own our own problems can we experience ourselves as strong and capable.

My Guidleines for Raising Responsible Children:


  • Avoid vague praise.  "Good boy" is useless to a child and does nothing for self-esteem.  If someone is a 'good' child, then they can be a 'bad' child.  Both words are to be avoided...

  • Be as specific as possible with praise feedback  with the goal of building a child's understanding of themselves.  "I saw you concentrating hard there."  "That was generous of you."  "You did your chore very quickly today."  Make it about noticing, discount cialis without prescription, Order cialis from canada, not handing out sugary verbal candy.  Much more valuable than the vague belief that you are 'special' is knowing what special things people see in you.

  • Let them learn from their mistakes and own their own problems.  You can nag them every day to wear a hat, but they'll learn to choose one themselves if you let them experience some cold.  Your grade ten student won't fail at life if he fails one math course.  The time you spend nagging at them instead of letting them experience a consequence is kind of enabling their irresponsibility.  That's right...you have created this monster!

  • Give consequences and stick to them.  No nagging.  No emotion.  There are only the choices they make and the results of those choices (natural or logical rewards or consequences).

  • Make them earn things.  Love and respect are given...all else is earned. 

  • Your teenager wants to go to a party.  Make them convince you why they should be able to go...rather than you convincing them you have the right to deny them something they haven't earned.  "Convince me."..."Come up with a plan about how you'll earn that." And if you're not convinced...say no.

  • Teach your child how to manage emotions...not how to avoid them.

  • Love them...you can't spoil with love...but be careful of defining love as protecting them from life and it's lessons.

  • Let them define their own goals.  Believe in their ability to reach those goals.

  • Model responsible behaviour.  This should have been first on the list.


Don't change everything at once.  I like how this website addresses changing things in your family slowly...how to talk to your kids about this stuff.., find no rx cialis. Where to buy cialis, http://www.childrentoday.com/articles/discipline/parents-who-pamper-4969/3/

Go for it. Order generic cialis. Cialis buy. Buy generic cialis online. Cheapest generic cialis online. Buy cialis in canada. Cialis medicine. Buy no rx cialis. Buy cheapest cialis online. Cialis drug. Buy cialis no rx. Order cialis in canada. Order cialis from us. Cialis rx. Cialis approved. Cheap cialis no prescription. Order discount cialis online. Cialis without prescription. Cialis internet. Buy cialis without prescription. Online cialis. Cheap cialis pharmacy. Cialis australia. Best price cialis. Order cheap cialis online. Buy cialis low price. Cheapest cialis online. Compare cialis prices. Cialis in australia.

Similar posts: Buy inderal without prescription. Buy lamictal without prescription. Buy minocycline without prescription. Buy norvasc without prescription. Buy zantac without prescription. Buy female pink viagra without prescription. Buy viagra without prescription. Buy gold viagra without prescription. Buy viagra super force without prescription. Buy viagra oral jelly without prescription.
Trackbacks from: Buy cialis without prescription. Buy cialis professional without prescription. Zestoretic without prescription. Viagra oral jelly without a prescription. Buy celexa without prescription. Clomid without prescription. Buy sumenta without prescription. Buy ultram without prescription. Buy alert caps (sleep & relaxation aid) without prescription. Buy female rx plus liquid without prescription.

{ 1 comment }

Buy cialis jelly without prescription, One of the things I do is attachment based therapy with parent and child.  Some of the lessons I learned in my training in attachment based therapy can help all of us parents (and grand parents!) to learn to be attuned to a child and use our simple interactions to build their self-esteem. 

Remember that when you have a child who is acting out and there is a focus on the negative in the home, you have the power to change the balance by increasing their esteem and the number of positive interactions you have with them.  See previous blog on this. 

I will describe a very simple and effective way to interact with your child during their play that will raise their self-esteem.  It's called Wait, Watch and Wonder... Cialis jelly vendors, First, put some interesting toys in front of your child.  Or let them pick their favorite toys. Or approach them when they are already playing, tablet cialis jelly. Cialis jelly overnight delivery,  Hopefully not something battery operated (and not television)!  Get down on the child's level, in a position from which you can see their face. 

2.  WAIT for them to play.  Be quiet for a moment, cialis jelly no prescription. Buy cheapest cialis jelly,   Mostly, you are in charge of how your family is run and what the schedule is, buy cialis jelly canada, Cialis jelly pharmacy, but when you are in WWW mode, when your child is engaged in play, order cialis jelly in us, Real cialis jelly without prescription, they are in charge!  Resist the urge to take over!  Wait to see what they do. 

3.  WATCH their face.  Their face is the window to their soul, and their needs, cialis jelly without a prescription, Buy cialis jelly no prescription required, and your connection to them.  They will often look at your face, and when they do you should be looking at them.  Don't watch the toys...don't watch the clock...don't watch your crackberry/iphone.  Give your child the gift of connection and watch their face, cialis jelly alternative. Purchase cialis jelly overnight delivery, 4.  WONDER, out loud, cialis jelly prescription, Cialis jelly information, about what they're thinking or feeling.  Say things that reflect your attunement to their play and their emotions.  This is not the time to test about colours or animal noises.  It's okay to do that sometimes, but that's not what WWW is about and that doesn't build their self-esteem.  Your voice should indicate that you have nothing else on your mind at the moment other than how thrilled you are to be with this child in this moment, compare cialis jelly prices online, Low price cialis jelly, noticing them and wondering about them.  Here's a sampling of appropriate things to say (adjust this for the child's age.  I am imagining a child who doesn't yet talk)... "Wow...you have a puppet!  You have a cow puppet!  Is it soft?  It's a soft cow.  I can see by your smile that you like that soft cow.  I wonder what you like about that cow...maybe the eyes.  It has big eyes...like you.  I love your beautiful eyes.  Oh...you're putting it on your hand now.  Do you feel your hand inside the cow?  Oh!  Your hand is making the cow move, buy cialis jelly without prescription. I wonder what that cow's going to say!"... 

Let's imagine a slightly older child and the sorts of things you might say.., find discount cialis jelly. Cialis jelly for order, "You've got all your animals here.  Let's see which ones Jennifer will choose today... the pig!  How's that pig feeling today?  (child answers 'sad') Oh really...tell me about the pig and what has made him sad."  ... later on.., cheap cialis jelly without prescription. Cialis jelly canada, "I see that the pig and the horse are fighting again.  Are they fighting, or playing?  (child says fighting)  And you are frowning.  Do you feel sad when the pig and the horse fight?".., cheapest cialis jelly price. Cialis jelly pill, For an older child, who is beyond the "playing years", get cialis jelly, Cialis jelly pharmacy online, use the concept to connect with them as they describe their day or their needs.  Even with a teenager, these simple steps can be useful in positioning us as our kids self-esteem builders.  (if you have a teenager, buy cialis jelly cheap, Cheap cialis jelly tablet, really your main goal is to get that kid to adulthood feeling good about themselves..you know that, right?)

I meet a lot of parents who bring their children to me in hopes that they will reveal to me what is bothering them.  Yet a parent who is attuned to their child has tremendously more power than I do to tap into that child's needs, no rx cialis jelly, Cialis jelly no rx required, and they can use WWW to stay connected.  It is a very powerful tool and I urge you to try it and to notice what difference it makes in your family. 

 It's not easy though.  It's hard work!  Our instincts are to be overactive guide a child's play, or to watch without interest or attention (we're bored or thinking about our own stuff).  Go back to this blog and re-read the instructions after doing it a few times (I recommend 10 minutes of WWW a day) to make sure you're still on track, cheap cialis jelly from canada. Pharmacy cialis jelly, I'll leave you with a delicious and short clip of a mom who is in a very attuned position with her adorable child who is telling her that he doesn't always like her.  It's not quite WWW, but this is so sweet, cialis jelly online pharmacy. Order cialis jelly no rx. Cialis jelly sale. Cialis jelly purchase. Cheap cialis jelly in uk. Price of cialis jelly. Buy cialis jelly us. Cialis jelly malaysia. Cialis jelly cheapest price.

Similar posts: Buy viagra plus without prescription. Buy viagra professional without prescription. Buy viagra soft tabs without prescription. Buy viagra super active+ without prescription. Buy yagara (herbal viagra) without prescription. Buy black cialis without prescription. Buy cialis without prescription. Buy cialis professional without prescription. Buy cialis soft tabs without prescription. Buy cialis super active+ without prescription.
Trackbacks from: Buy cialis jelly without prescription. Buy ultram without prescription. Allopurinol without a prescription. Jungle burn online without prescription. Lamisil cream online without prescription. Buy viagra plus without prescription. Verapamil online without prescription. Buy arimidex without prescription. Buy actos without prescription. Geodon without prescription.

{ 0 comments }